That I take everything from his house. Free him of my energy. Free myself from those ties. At first it was because I thought that I would move somewhere else eventually and I would someday soon pick up the rest of my material posessions, but someday didn't come soon enough. In a few months it will have been a year since I left his cozy home by the ocean. I realize that besides the physical labor of it, it is going to be difficult for me in other ways too.

I had given my heart to someone else later on in that year, and later he gave it back to me.
I'm sad and lonely and this is my journey.

I have been reluctant to write about all of this because I didn't want to sound like such a downer, but this is where I am at.
I started smoking again and drinking wine in the afternoon. I sleep a lot. I've been hibernating and I'm trying to wake up.
I am slowly beginning to open my eyes. Slowly.